oh no!

I have him. I found him. Hes THE ONE.

Love is not the same though as it was back then. people are braking up and getting a divorce. It's really sad.

My heart was broken when I was 14. I am still recovering from it, but I am moving on better than I thought I would.

I have a new Bf who I think is going to ask me to marry him on Dec,25,2010. This is a big deal. He said he wants to talk to my dad and do it right. I am excited. I have never been treated so well, the way I should be. We do everything together. Just yesterday he went to go get my tree and we decorated it. I hate Christmas music but I wanted to hear it with him and dance.

My parents were dancing in the other room I crabbed his hands and started dancing with him right next to my parents. It was cute, my dad looked over and smiled at him. My dad likes him. He thinks he's not fake and he keeps his word.

I hope that if he does pop the ? I am ready for it. I want to say yes in high hopes that I will b happy for the rest of my life and he will love me until I die.

errrrrr

Today is thanksgiving. it was not so good.

I went into a deep depression. I have not been in one of those for a long time. In one of my older post I talked about my sisters kid and how she is a monster. Today my sister told me she is due for another one... WTH.

I think my sister likes the baby stage. She gives her 4 year old no attention and anything she wants. She never disaplines her. My niece always says hurtful things like
*I hate you
*You r dumb
*Go die
* I don't need you

This is bad for a child. I don't even have kids yet but anyone with common sence can see this is BAD. My niece hits and spits at people. If my sister and her new husband keep raising Her like that she will be a mess when she is 12, prob pego and smoking.

I hate that she is having another kid when she is practicing bad parenting skills on her current child. She and her husband have no house and live with my parents. Her husband jumps job to job.

God help us all!

He was just like you

It was what I always wanted.

*He held my hand
*Opend doors for me
*brought me on dates
*called me is gf
* Take care of me when I was sick
*cuddle me until midnight
*Told me I was beautiful
*Told me he loved me
*Told me he wanted to marry me

I know you are different. You do all those things but you keep doing those things. You always tell me I LOVE YOU. It's so nice that you prove to me that you will always be there for me and that you will never change.

I am vary happy that I know you and have you in my life. I love you so much. I hope that when you said "I'll prove to you how much I love you on christmas" that you were saying I will propose to you and I will marry you.

:D My best friend KF tells me that she thinks you are my forever and for always. I would be happy with you the rest of my life. YOU would be the only one I would have kids with. I never wanted kids until I ment you.

why?

Hey there. I know I haven't wrote in a long time. Reasons for this
*work
*new man
*to much going on

I am so upset lately! People who are close to me keep pushing my feelings aside. I told my mom how I was being mistreated. She said "I don't want to hear about it" wtf! theres people at church and one of my family members who tell her their stories all the time. Not once has she said "i don't want to hear about it" Even though those people make her depressed and she wants to feel needed. I need her and she isn't there for me. I think that this is messed up.

When something is wrong I have to go to my bf or best friend for help and vent. I should be able to talk to my close family to. :/ I am so upset. I caught myself starting to tear up and I'm starting to feel ignored and unwanted. My feelings always get pushed aside.. But why?

This blog is a good way to vent. I think I am going to start posting in here again.

:D

I have been so happy! I am so loved.
Some things you do

• hug me
• tell me I am beautiful
• tell me how much you love me
• open doors for me
• give my piggy back rides
• Hangout with me everyday
• kiss me
• bring me places
• Care for me when I am sick or sad
• Make me stuff I can use-My wooden heart.
• Come to my family events
• Invite me everywhere u go
• Let me hangout with you and your friends
• Cuddle me
• Look me in the eyes
• Let me talk forever

Little things that you do make me happy!

My family adores you. My dad says he thinks you are an old fashioned good man! My mom wants me to marry you. It's weird how good you make me feel. I have not been happy in a long time. You did it! U r amazing and my everything.

I like when my man has a good family

I love family! The word and the interaction I get when I am around family.

I like to interact with others family and not just my own. Last night I went camping with CDL's family. His uncle and ant were really nice. I felt like I belonged there. We could all joke about sexual jokes, people and just have fun. I had a great time!! We are going up there again to stay the night.

I really like that I ma invited to all family events. I like the homemade games family's make. I really like the food I get. I really like to talk and be talked to. CDL's family treats me like I am married to him. It's kinda nice.

:D Well I am off to go camping with such a nice family.

life can go by to fast!

"I'm sorry" Lol don't bother saying it. when it comes out of your mouth it's just an excuse for you to hurt me again.

"I love you" I love hearing this phrase.. it makes me happy. But when I ask some people what they love about me, they can't answer.

I love you
KMF
CDL
DL
LAK
KSK
BAK
SMK
JPK
JEK

Most of these people above are my faimly. One of them is my best friend who will always b there for me.

When these people tell me they love me I know they do.. they show it!